Monday, March 11, 2013

Birthday presents and other dilemmas

This is how far I have got with P's felt playmat.  It might look like a reasonable amount, but since it is as far as I was before last week, I am pretty concerned that I'm not going to get it done in time.

I'm really disappointed with myself for not doing more, but the last few weeks have been a little difficult.  C has started waking at night, and then staying awake for an hour or more in the middle of the night, and it is really wearying.  Its not the exhaustion so much.  Being awake from 4am til 5.30am this morning, I can cope with being really tired by having an extra cup of tea, or letting P and J watch some TV, and by only doing the minimum I need to get by housework wise.  Its the weariness that accompanies the night wakings that is the problem.  The inability to concentrate on something.  The sitting down for 5 minutes that turns into 30 minutes of listlessly browsing the internet.  The dead tiredness and lack of motivation at the end of the day that makes it so hard to even get off the couch let alone get my craft stuff out of the cupboard.  And underlying it all is the feeling that I'm never going to feel rested again, or manage to do any of the things I really want to.

So what I'm saying is that I'm tired.  Time to rethink the presents, and really some bought stuff will be just as appreciated by P, and if I don't get the playmat done, there is always Christmas.

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